Moonshadows made a comment in her “The Truth Behind the Mommy Wars” post that got me thinking . . . She said:
Another problem with the current “social situation” is that (assuming a two parent household) if one parent is working and the other is not, the non-working parent’s future is potentially jeapordized.
I was the primary breadwinner in our family the first six years of our marriage, as my hubby made his way through university, while we simultaneously grew our family and shared the responsibility of caring for them on a daily basis. Upon graduation, it was time for me to get to stay home finally, full time. So, the past 15 years, I have been a stay-at-home mom, and the past 14 years, a homeschooling mommy. So, is my future potentially jeapordized?
An interesting thing happened in the middle of this time I have been a SAH/homeschooling mom: my hubby was jealous! Not because he wanted to stay home and be a househubby, but because he recognized the unique opportunity I have to develop my passions and make a difference in the world in the way that I choose as important to me. He was SO right, and I am grateful for my unique place in our home that grants me this opportunity.
What have I been developing with the freedoms being a homeschooling mommy affords me? I have learned oodles about learning! Visual-spatial learners, structured learners, unschooling learning, therapeutic learning, teen learning, toddler learning . . . I have learned about learning challenges like autism, memory differences, attention differences, sleeping pattern impacts, hyperactivity, impulsivity, auditory processing differences . . . I have found talents within myself I didn’t know existed like writing, public speaking, facilitating, a natural behaviorist, patience . . . In my free time, I CHOOSE to read materials that will enhance my understanding in any of these areas, attend conferences to gather new advances, and collaborate with other parents in gaining new insights. My hubby shakes his head and feels I don’t know how to just relax. Well, I really LOVE learning!
Although I have this plethora of experience and knowledge, am I still lacking for not having a degree to back it up in today’s world? Maybe. I’ve certainly gone back and forth regarding pursuing a degree in order that I might gain credibility. But, since I’ve come this far, I’m trying really hard to discipline myself enough to write a book starting in the fall, and see if I can get it off the ground enough to see if that can take me anywhere in sharing my experiences to a broader segment of people.
I feel blessed to be a woman today. I feel blessed by the freedoms I enjoy in my life to explore and discover and development myself in areas I never thought would enter my life if I had tried to plan it out, or if I had to walk a path that had limits, like being the main breadwinner of a household of nine. Boy, do I appreciate my hubby and all he does for our family. And girl, does he slightly envy my opportunities, but fully supports and celebrates all that I bring to our family.
At this time, I feel like my life has been full to overflowing with extraordinary opportunities and I have taken them. I see my future full of hope and giving back and full of possibilities. I see it as more than what financial value I can bring, but what worth I can give. I’ll end with the motto my daughter has chosen to live by, that she put in her Build-a-Bear:
It’s what you give that makes you beautiful; it’s how you live that makes your dreams come true.
Yep, I think that’s what being a homeschooling mommy did for me. And my life is more than I ever dreamed of 🙂