Keeping a Daughter; Gaining a Son

So, it has been forever since writing, and I hope to rededicate to my blog.  There is so much to report and as this doubles as my visual journal, I do need to catch back up.  I’ll do a little “back reporting” over the next some posts, and throwing a few current things here and there.

So, you know the adage, “you’re not losing a daughter, you’re gaining a son”?  Well, I wasn’t sure if that could really be true, but now that my only daughter has just gotten married, I can now tell you my side of things:  my new son-in-law is ABSOLUTELY my new son!  I love him dearly, as if he were my own.  AND, my relationship with my daughter is as amazing as ever.  Best thing yet:  my son-in-law admires our relationship and encourages my daughter to stay close to me.  Now, how many young men do you know with that type of maturity?  I’m so glad not to be viewed as a monster-in-law, but as a mother-in-law that he loves, as I love him.  Woohoo!

So, here’s the timeline from last I wrote:  In July, they went through some rocky times trying to figure out how to communicate with each other and learning to appreciate each other’s differences.  In August, Ben went on our beach trip with us to South Carolina for a week.

Also in August, Ben started working for me full-time so that he didn’t have to work nights anymore, which wasn’t good for him or their relationship.  Also, he is a natural with my boys that he works with!

At the end of August, Abbey chose to return to Brigham Young University for at least one semester, in order to sort out her feelings about everything that had happened so quickly.  I flew out with her as my oldest son, Eric, was going to consider living out there as well.  Within hours of arriving, and confirmed within days, Abbey decided everything had changed for her and that BYU didn’t hold the same pull as before.  She missed Ben.

On Labor Day weekend in September, Ben flew out and found out that Abbey had dropped all her classes and intended to return home with all of us.  On their first day together, they hiked the “Y” and Ben surprised Abbey back and proposed to her, ring and all.

In September, I was able to keep Abbey employed with me working with her brothers, so now they were seeing each other every day, all day.  The engagement process for two people who choose the “old-fashioned route” of not living together before marriage, not sleeping together before marriage, and courting up until marriage can actually be a difficult process mainly because they are making a huge decision based on faith and pure loyalty and commitment.  Divorce is not an option to be considered; so understanding that the choice is forever can be overwhelming.  Yet, the Lord sustains them in their love for each other and they learn they will stand beside each other and help each other through thick and thin.

In October, a “meet the parents” party was held at our house.  We like both Ben’s parents.  Later in the month, Abbey and Ben had their engagement pictures on our property.

In November, Abbey enjoyed two showers; one in North Carolina and one in Utah.  Her North Carolina shower featured Tupperware; her Utah shower featured the four seasons and her college friends.

And then came December.  Abbey was married to Ben on Saturday, December 18, 2010, at 11:00 a.m. in the Raleigh, North Carolina LDS temple.  It was a wonderful day!

I am truly blessed with my family and now I am blessed with the quality of people being added to my family.  And, I get to see both of them most every day!  How lucky am I?

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